This is linked up with the Breastfeeding Blog Hop hosted by The Slacker Mom!
I had little to no issues beginning (and maintaining) a breastfeeding relationship. Is this why I find it awkward to be sympathetic to other mothers? I wouldn’t want someone feeling sorry for me at all nor do I want anyone’s sympathy. Saying sorry insinuates it was a fault you committed or you had control over the matter.
I usually say, “I’m sorry!” when a mother says she tried breastfeeding but a slew of issues prevented a continued nursing relationship. Is this the best and appropriate response? What if I really wanted to say more than just sympathy and help her? Am I being a snob/bitch/cold for doing so? Is it appropriate to tell her that it’s most likely a breastfeeding myth meant to instill failure and fear in a new mother?
Here are things I really want to say in place of “I’m sorry” about breastfeeding:
“I couldn’t breastfeed.”
I’m sorryMany of breastfeeding issues can be resolved as a tiny percentage cannot truly breastfeed.
“He’s not gaining weight fast enough.”
I’m sorryBirth weight is mostly fluids so his/her weight is absolutely fine.
“I’m so tired.”
I’m sorryIt’s absolutely normal for breastfed babies to not sleep through the night.
“He self-weaned at 6 months.”
I’m sorryWorldwide natural weaning can occur between 2 – 7 years of age.
“I had to go back to work and had no milk.”
I’m sorryMany women do not respond to pumps and have to try many different kinds until they find one that works.
“My child was starving and I had to feed formula.”
I’m sorryDid you know that formula is actually 4th on the list of infant feeding methods? Here’s how it breaks down:
1. Breastmilk at the breast
2. Mom’s own expressed breastmilk
3. Screened, pasteurized donor breastmilk.
4. Infant formula.
What else can you say instead of “I’m sorry?” What have you said to a breastfeeding problem you knew could be resolved?