You know what’s even worse than mothers pitting against other mothers? When people like to give their uneducated opinions about something they have never experienced first-hand nor have any educated information besides feeding off of misinformation and stereotypes. I have been a Yelp member since 2010 when I discovered the user-reviews site of local businesses and events. I started the account at a time I was child-free scoping out reviews for bars and nightlife. Now, I am reviewing play grounds and kids stores in a sea of boozin’ singles again but in the ‘big’ city. Elite status basically means you have to make the higher-ups like you somehow and you get put on this special email list for parties and organized events. Oh, and a
fancy website badge.
This ‘big city’ Yelp forum had an interesting topic called “Breastfeeding Cover” asking,
What are your thoughts on this? When is “too old” for a child to be breastfeeding, and does it bother you if you see someone breastfeeding in public (regardless of the child’s age)?
I thought, “Oh shit, here we go. On Yelp, really?” There were some great thoughtful pieces and there were some, uh, not so great comments. I have put aside the idea that Yelp is a generalization of the entire population mindset of this ‘big city’ and just hope that these not-so-great comments either would:
a) Never have kids.
b) Take a breastfeeding education or anthropology class.
There are women and men on both sides – one side, who form an uneducated opinion based on just that and the other side, who don’t care about how others raise their kid(s). I have compiled a list of my favorite and
the stupid not-so-favorite comments from the Yelpers under their corresponding category type.
Fellow Lactivists – parents who have been there, done that and actually understand.
“[T]here are a number of things you’re overlooking or ignorant about. If a breast pump were the only expense that came with a baby, then many more people would be able to afford them. As feeding options go, breastfeeding is the cheapest and most convenient.”
“As someone who is painfully aware, breast feeding in public SUCKS. And don’t tell me to stay home. Because I am hormonal & did I mention tired & I will bite your head off. ,;-) just kidding…sorta…honestly I’ve had more than one waitress or worker at an establishment make positive comments to me as I discreetly fed my kiddo in the past.”
“I’m going to guess neither of you have kids.”
“To support my wife (re: breastfeeding in public SUCKS) I don’t give a shit if you’re bothered by it or grossed out. It’s good for the baby and it’s not sexual. Sorry you can’t handle it – no wait – no I’m not. Even if I personally find the sight of a 3 year old breast feeding “distasteful” it’s my own problem and I keep my goddamn trap shut because the last thing a mother needs is some disapproving stare or comment.”
“To me this is much like a conservative Christian being offended by and opposed to gay marriage – and personally squicked by gays holding hands or kissing. It’s not an issue they get to really “weigh in on” b/c it’s not their decision how other people’s relationships.“
Child-Free Support – a subset of the child-free population, who have some knowledge of the biology and importance of breastfeeding or, as evidenced by the last comment, a man who knows what to say.
“Our society is full of too many prudes and it’s sad that people have a problem with breastfeeding. I don’t want to listen to a baby cry because it’s hungry at the mall, so the mom should be able to feed them.”
“To answer the question — plenty of societies breast feed well past the point where the kid can say “im hungry mom”, but Im fine being part of one where that isn’t…normal? And there is nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public, and I think they should be covered only to protect them from creep-a-zoid looky loos.”
“I think its none of my business. Period.“
The Nipple Police – people who say they “support” breastfeeding but want you to cover that shit up!
“But I have no problem with breast feeding. A little courtesy is appreciated, like asking “will it bother you if I breast feed right next to you?” Or just pulling the baby blanket up a little over the shoulder.”
“It only bothers me if they make no effort to hide their dang nipples.”
“I agree- I see no problem in breast feeding a child up till age 2 or 3, but I personally feel that the older the kid, the more it should be done within the privacy of ones home.”
Ignoramus – no explanation needed.
“And whilst I don’t really care about whipping out teh boobie in public for feeding (or most other reasons or non-reasons, as it were), a cover is just common courtesy. Then again, I’ve always wondered why there were so many women who couldn’t afford a C-note for a breast pump.”
“On the pump thing….was just a random observation, the argument presented against it touches on a different topic and much larger personal pet peeve re: having children without having the decency to know whether one has the ability to actually afford one.”
“6 months. Even one year is too old IMO. It creeps me the fuck out when I see toddlers still breastfeeding.”
“It’s the attachment on the mother’s part, which is selfish. And who says it’s “good for the baby” after a year? The nutrients the child receives can be ingested from regular food and milk.”
“I mean hell, I don’t walk around cock-flapping everywhere. They do it in 3rd world countries, so it must be natural, right?“
“WTF?” is right, right? Talk amongst yourselves.