Even a whole year later, I still say, “Holy shit! People actually read my blog!” and, of course, a big “Thank you!” In just a year of naptime drafting and sporadically posting, I’ve come to get to know quite a few online identities in the mom community from all social media fronts. Some good, some bad, and somebody’s always got an issue. You write to share something in hopes others will comment, lament, or think it’s the funniest shit ever. I strive for at least two of these with every blog post or tweet.
Kidding aside (no really, comments are the holy grail of being online), I want to share some insight into my world of being an online parent:
1. Mommy Wars are real!
I thought it was this mythical tale of a mean mommy blogger attacking a newbie mom for saying something about her hair. Come to find out, Mommy Wars are online comment matches usually ending up with who gets the most support by other onlooking moms. Yeah, I see ya, Facebook.
2. Being anonymous is the smartest thing I could do.
Using pseudonyms and nicknames not only helps keep the creepers away, but it also makes for a livelier dialogue. I mean, it’s just more interesting to call my husband Gym Hottie, his college nickname, than simply referring him to the father of my child(ren). I have heard of online horror stories where moms have gotten hits on their blog through a search of their child’s full legal name! YIKES. Plus, I don’t want what I stupidly did or say tracked back to me in real life.
3. Not everyone will enjoy how you say things online and vice versa.
I once was told that how I say things is not how others may perceive them. Well, of course not, unless you have text-o-gram where my every intonation and sarcasm pitch of my online text is voiced by Morgan Freeman. I’ve gotten butt-hurt by what someone has said online and I have made others butt-hurt too. It’s the name of the game.
4. You can go viral by making a meme so others can laugh at your expense.
Nothing like getting a rise out of people by showcasing abuse by your child. It’s been real nice getting my 15 seconds of mommy fame thanks to me keepin’ it real when it comes to breastfeeding a toddler.
5. Staying true to yourself will not get you a billion followers.
Not everyone will get your niche whatever that may be. For heavens sake, I’m a 26-year-old ‘crunchy’ pregnant mom blogger who tries to cook Lao food for her blog but fails miserably. I can’t seem to connect on a level with the Giveaway Blog Mom or the Working Mom Ranty Blogs and they have a huge following. I keep it real when I can with the little following I have because they obviously like what I say and I’ll continue saying it.
6. There are too few recognized online moms of color.
Then again, maybe I’m doing something wrong where my Laotian niche hasn’t reached Ellen- Degeneres -famous yet but even the Top 10 Mom Bloggers don’t have much of a tint of color. I’m not here to change the world but I’d a least like to change that list sometime. Even if it’s not by me, I know there will be another influential mama-blogger of color who will!
7. You will meet your life-long friends online.
There’s not a day where I don’t wish I could gather all my like-minded mamas and stick us in a commune and be sister-mamas. When you find and connect with another person who gets “you” it’s the most fulfilling experience to laugh and connect like you’ve been friends forever. Even if I never get to The Ellen Show, I’m so grateful to have “met” such a beautiful array of mamas (and dadas!) in all aspects of my online life from near to across the world.
I love you!
What have you gained or learned from your online community of mamas? Am I following you yet?
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