It has been such a guilt-ridden journey with this second pregnancy and staying true to child-led weaning. My heart sank when I no longer was able to hear the hurried gulps of my milk flowing or the uncanny ability to quickly dispense breast milk for any and all ailments (Got mom zits? Put breast milk on it. Oh, someone’s got pink eye? Give ’em a courtesy squirt of milk). My milk supply dipped around the beginning of the second trimester and then was non-existent yet we continued our breastfeeding as a live human pacifier and like my body wasn’t preoccupied with other body-happenins for this other baby. I disappointingly took in all the common information about how Humnoy may fully wean because there’s no milk and he may not enjoy colostrum, a (new) baby’s first type of milk, when it comes in well before Bebe arrives since we’re still nursing.
I remember colostrum as the yellow milk because that’s exactly what it looked like – a yellowish, thick “first” milk my body produced for newborn Humnoy. I almost overlooked it as orange juice dribble from breakfast until I expressed my right breast and there it was. Repeat the left and the same clear, thick milk came out to say, “I’m here and we’re ready to party again.” Approaching 27 weeks of pregnancy and 20 months of breastfeeding, I am making milk again. Figuring the next time that’d be said is after Bebe arrived, I am grateful my body is doing whatever goddess-ly power it possesses.
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