A Breastfeeding Love/Hate for Weddings


pregnant bridesmaid.jpg

It’s that time of year again: WEDDING SEASON. That time of year where everybody is getting married off. Where you get to see your old party friends before you never see them again until the next pair marries off. It’s a lot different now that I’m a breastfeeding mom with two littles pawing at my bra. Last year, I was an actual bridesmaid and I made it being gone from Humnoy for an entire day. I was decently pregnant and my milk had dried up but it was still very hard being apart. This year, we were invited to a wedding that we plan to attend at the end of August. Lanoy will be at the tail end of six months around the wedding. We may or may not have started baby-led weaning by this time but as you know, BLW doesn’t mean they’re eating much of anything. I will still be exclusively breastfeeding her so  I love and hate weddings.

I love weddings because they’re friggin’ fun as hell. Free food, free music, free mostly everything and hanging with people you love. Did I mention that they serve food? Anytime someone offers me food, I am all over that shit like it’s my second dinner. When I mentioned it to GH about his final say for our official RSVP, he was surprised I was going to opt out because she’ll only be six months. He saw it as an opportunity to have a ‘date night.’ I had never thought about that because a) Mom brain, b) breastfeeding baby, and c) what’s ‘date night?’ The super awesome thing is that the wedding is back in my hometown, where I would leave the kids with my mom, who I have still have not spoken to with her recent tirade on my failure with my success. Bright side is I wouldn’t have to talk to her when I drop off her beautiful grand babies. My mom’s house is also a 7-minute drive from the venue. Also, a few hours kid-free? EEEEEEE.

I hate weddings because they’re a lot of work. Wedding guests aren’t allowed to say that, are they? Whatever, I said it. Being a breastfeeding wedding guest is even more work. Being a breastfeeding guest at a no-children-allowed wedding is tough shit. With the wedding less than two months away, I have no pumped milk or even any idea how to give the baby the pumped milk. Humnoy didn’t take the bottle for a few months when I returned to part-time work. This part literally terrifies me and also kicks my ass into high gear to put my pumping milk tips to practice. There’s also the thing of looking halfway decent as a wedding guest. Weddings aren’t a place for spandex capris or a sloppy bun.

image courtesy saludoimage.com

I’m torn. I mailed off our RSVP excitedly as I imagined a night of alcoholic drinks and dry-humping my husband on the dance floor like old times. I then realize how little Lanoy will still be by that time. God, she’ll only 7 minutes away. Once I leave because no one can calm her down like my tits can, it’s unlikely we’ll come back unless NSYNC is performing or something. She’ll also most likely sleep most of the time I’m gone. PER USUAL. Why am I still even thinking about this? WTF is wrong with me; there will be food. I’m such a goddamn mom.

How did you prepare for your first time away from a breastfeeding baby?

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11 thoughts on “A Breastfeeding Love/Hate for Weddings

  1. I started pumping a little each day starting at two weeks in prep for my return back to part time work when he was three months. It was hard and a lot of work. The first time I left him it was a disaster, he wouldn’t take the bottle even though we had prepped him for the weeks leading up to it. We had to change bottle twice. Now at almost a year he will drink pumped breast milk out of bottles, cups, whatever. It’s been a long road!

  2. I couldn’t even imagine starting to pump now. I used to pump once a day because I was perpetually engorged, but I haven’t in a few months and my boobs have decided to stop responding to the fake shit. I know my supply’s still good, even though I’m never engorged any more (you’ve seen meeses chunky ass). Does this happen to people? Anyhoogle… I hope you go. I hope you go and eat everything and sweat your fancy non-mom wedding hair out!

      • Yeah dude! Mase has a full on meltdown if I even think about giving him a bottle. But mike shows him a bottle and grubs up! My kid gets it. Fresh is cool, but why wait for mom?

  3. Omg i have to read all the responses to this post lol i have yet to leave my 16 month old and now I’m sure i wont leave him or his 3 month baby brother for a while. Lol Breastfeeding does play a huge part on why i havent had a “date night” actually it plays in on a lot of things, like visiting my in-laws. Its completely off topic but i havent taken my kids to see my in-laws since my hunny left may 14th. I always feel weird when i breastfeed around them. I’m not normally shy about it, I’m actually really discreet but good lawd’ I feel like I’m being judged and torn apart in their private thoughts. I “feel” it. They were surprised I breastfed longer than 6 months imagine what they will think if they see me nurse my big 16month old or even better lol… both my 16month old AND 3 month old. Oh gawd…. lol yeah I think I’ll wait till my husband comes back. Who knows what I’ll say if I’m critisized by them, I always sensor myself around them because my husband is there but on my own I might just … idk.. say what I feel lol well yeah,totally off topic but yeah. Hopefully you wont back out of going to the wedding. You are only going to be 7 minutes away(: you deserve a little fun, believe me you deserve it!

  4. I was recently invited to my cousin’s no-children-allowed wedding and I opted out. Arranging childcare was going to be a hassle because it was around bedtime and she was only sleeping by being nursed into dreamland. Also, she can’t even hang with her grandma for more than 2 hours (and she sees grandma on a weekly basis) so it was just too much for too little. The day before the wedding they had a reception for all the relatives & friends, so we went to that. (it was a 3 day wedding)

  5. From what you described sounds like a pretty good situation. With two months till the event, you have a good two months to prepare baby…or more likely, prepare yourself for the hours apart. To get me to take a few hours away from my little guy, my hubs has to start mentally and emotionally preparing me for a few days in advance. He also keeps checking in and making sure I’m still up for a night out. Too often I cancel to stay home instead. Lately, we’ve been making more efforts to be out but that’s because our child care situation changed dramatically. My sister moved to Chicago and we’re now out and about at least once every two months. Which to some might not seem a lot, but to us is. haha. And, based on what you’ve been writing, is probably a lot in your eyes too. Good luck with the pumping. I f-in hate pumping.

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