I just got off the phone with my lawyers because I’m suing Snooki. Bitch stole my future book! Sorry, Mz. Polizzi, but I am the only party girl turned proud mama ’round these parts. You just allowed a camera crew. Her book:
The greatest thing Nicole Polizzi, aka “Snooki,” ever did was an accident. But her son, Lorenzo, was never a mistake. When she and her boyfriend, Jionni, found out she was knocked up, they weren’t married or even engaged. She was only 24 and living with her parents—and she had zero baby experience. With a reckless, party girl TV persona to deal with, she had a lot to learn and discover in becoming a mother.
In this hilarious and honest guide, Snooki provides tips and advice for any girl who may become a parent—whether she planned to or not. From morning sickness (“an endless hangover”) to “smushin’ with a cushion,” (pregnant sex), Snooki’s funny and frank book shows that, though she gave up smoking, drinking, and partying, she’s embracing motherhood the only way she knows how: with a fun-loving attitude (and, of course, leopard skin crib sheets!).
The kids were “not planned” and we got hitched when I was four months pregnant. My recklessness just didn’t happen on national television. Trust me: nobody wanted to see that. No hard feelings, Snookz. I think I’ve exploited my life enough from 2003-2010 with faded developed photos now stuffed into shoe boxes. You can have this one. Just don’t patent the “house party to home birth” niche because I’ll cut you.